The quiet courage that comes with being yourself

Thoughts on embracing authenticity and letting yourself grow and change

There’s a courage that comes with letting a new self exist in a world that may or may not have changed with you. To firmly embrace who you feel simmering on the inside and let them emerge into the world. To not sway when questions are asked, because alongside the curiosity, you can hear the unspoken whisper, “Oh, but why did you change? Weren’t things good already?”

When I was younger, I had this vague idea that once you reach adulthood, you’re done with growing. You would arrive in your final form and everything would magically make sense. I eagerly waited for this moment to arrive, but it never did.

I do wonder where I collected this idea that growth “stops” after reaching adulthood. It could be because of all the series I watched when I was younger and the storyline usually changed once the main character would settle down. And looking back, most people in my surrounding did seem to venture into a way of living where nothing really changed once they would settle down. Instead, a repetition seeped in where one juggled a job, a home and a family.

I know this is a very broad generalization, but I do feel we’re all familiar with some version of the “white picket fence” dream. In a way, it felt like a final stage of life with how much emphasis was placed on finding a good job and then a partner to build a home with. There was never an emphasis on finding who you are along the way.

In all honesty, I’m not quite sure what it means to be an adult. Aside from seemingly being able to do whatever you desire, I didn’t stop changing once I stepped over the threshold of eighteen. Physically, the changes might have been less drastic, but mentally, emotionally, spiritually? I’ve shifted so many times already.

One thing that still surprises me is the season of feeling lost before I step into a new self. The unraveling of the old and the grief of knowing that who I once was isn’t residing in the future I desire to experience. It still catches me by surprise and alongside this, a layer of guilt for desiring more than I currently have.

And it isn’t that I’m ungrateful or that I lack something in the present. It’s a curiosity that begins to grow as I continue to learn about myself. It fuels my dreams and wishes and the knowing that there’s so much magic to experience. It automatically leads to realizing that you’ve outgrown who you are in the present and that there’s a new self you can step into; one that aligns with how you want to express yourself moving forward.

We’re not meant to become stagnant in our journey and our power resides in knowing that we’re allowed to change. Our magic lives in our ability to embrace our authenticity even if the world around us so eagerly wants to tell us who we should be and how we should act.

The beauty of being alive is to curate a way of living that aligns with you on every level. A way of existing where you know your worth and where you’re not shrinking yourself to fit someone else’s narrative. You know your story deserves to be written and you proudly take center stage, complete with all the costume changes, plot twists and chapter endings. It takes courage to let your heart guide you and to have all facets of self be reflected under the stage light, but given the fact that our heart is what keeps us alive, isn’t this the least you can do for yourself?

I know this is a journey, especially if you come from a path where you were you wore masks and costumes that didn’t quite fit who you were on the inside. There can be a lot of unlearning to do, but what I came to realize is that the unlearning starts with an acceptance for who you are now and the road you’ve traveled so far. To start with keeping tiny promises to yourself and nurturing the awareness that you’re enough without an approval from the outside world. It will feel strange at first, but the more you embrace what makes you, you, the more you will belong to yourself again.

If you ever find yourself staring in the mirror, realizing you are outgrowing the one that’s reflected back, take a deep breath. Then, celebrate it. Celebrate the knowing that you are evolving and changing. Celebrate that your dreams want to take up more space. Celebrate that there’s a part of you that desires to be seen. Celebrate the potential that’s reflected back to you.

There’s always a new self lingering in the distance and knowing that you get to grow into that person while letting yourself be enough in the present moment; now that’s where the beauty and excitement of being a magical human being resides.

Of course, this is just my humble opinion and I feel could reflect on this a lot more, but for now the thought of living in a world where more and more beautiful souls embrace who they are? It makes me feel all the positive vibes and happy feels.

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Hello, lovely! I’m TJ, an artist and storyteller and on here, you will find gentle reflections & musings on life, self love, healing and the magic of mundane wonders, alongside glimpses into enchanted worlds through my art. Make yourself cozy, have a read and I hope the words will connect and bring a dash of wonder and magic into your day.

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